Living in Light of the Resurrection
By: Sean Scott
We are doing a series on “Living in Light of the Resurrection” over the next several weeks. This week I interviewed a family to ask: How have things changed at home? What have you learned about yourself during this time? And finally, How could the resurrection change how we live and interact with our family more than we’re used to?
I posed questions to both the parents and students hoping to get the perspectives of each as they reflect on the state of things at home these days. You’ll see a “Parents” and “Students” section for each answer. The responses are anonymous.
How have things changed at home, if at all, due to these social distancing measures and “normal” life being disrupted?
Parents:
“It hasn’t been the big changes that push us as much as the cumulative effect of the little ones. For example, the simple things like getting groceries has become an time consuming endeavor filled with fear and trembling as we hope to avoid contamination. Having our kids at home while they do school remotely, for the most part, has been an easy transition since we spent so many years home schooling them. Yet, more bodies in the house yields more opportunities for conflict.”
“Things are quieter in some ways. There's no guessing about who will be home each night for dinner and who might be gone: we are all here! Work has continued for me and in some ways requires more time and energy. But I also feel thankful that I can continue, and while zoom is not the same as real life, It has been great to continue to see the faces of all my students! I also love the extra time we get to spend as a family. We do get on each other's nerves a little more!”
Students:
“We have had much more time to spend with the whole family. That also means a lot more little arguments have erupted between my sister and me. Really, though, it’s meant a lot more TV for all of us.”
“I have to do school at home. It nice because I can see my family more throughout the day. I can’t see any of my friends or go anywhere, so I just stay at home all day.”
2. What have you learned about yourself during this time? Some examples might be: struggling with things like showing grace, being patient, or learning about how much you valued being in the routine of being with people regularly, etc…
Parents:
“Using Zoom has been more difficult than I had expected to connect with people. For me, Zoom has also been associated with work and getting business done. Transitioning to try to emotionally connect with people on the platform is surprising dissatisfying. It’s just not the same as being together in person.
I’m feeling more anxious about the our financial security (or lack thereof) than about getting sick or even death. For example, if I die, I’ve taken steps to make sure my family will be financially okay. However, if I live and have no money, or worse no toilet paper, where do I run?!?! Oh yeah, there’s a good answer to question that I keep forgetting about.”
“I have learned that I take on more than I should as a general rule. If I'm quarantined and still struggling to finish all the things on my plate, I shouldn't be so surprised that I'm always running behind in non-quarantine life! I'm also realizing how much I value face to face interaction. There's no substitute for being with a person in real life and being able to laugh with them or talk and see body language, in addition to just their face.”
Students:
“I have a lot more anxiety with school, and it’s really hard to be patient when I get angry. I knew all these things already, but I have to learn how to deal with it more than I used to.”
“I've learned how much energy I get from people and how truly important fellowship with believers is. I realized how much I've taken for granted like hugging, singing as a congregation, even just a noisy restaurant! I would honestly give anything to be sitting in a noisy restaurant haha! I've learned how important and crucial rest is. Not the kind of rest where you're binging netflix and napping all day, but the spiritual rest found in Christ that comes out when we slow down, stop, and behold God. I hope that even when this is all over I will take the time to be still and rest in God. I've also learned the need for talking to myself and preaching the gospel to myself as often as possible. Martin Lloyd-Jones once said, ‘Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself?’ In this time when we're often alone with our thoughts and have more time to think we shouldn't let our deceitful hearts take the lead because honestly it probably won't lead anywhere good. Instead we need to cultivate our thoughts to be glorifying and honoring to God.”
3. We just celebrated Easter a couple of weeks ago. How could the resurrection change how we live and interact with our family more than we are used to?
Parents:
“Trusting and finding hope in the resurrection and all that it means for me today takes intentionality, that is, if I don’t take the time and energy to set my mind on it, it will have little effect on my day to day. So, thanks for reminder! The resurrection means I must be free with giving grace to those around me because the resurrection has brought infinite grace to me. The resurrection means I can let go my fear/anxiety of losing my health, my money, my home, or even my life because the resurrection brings the guarantee of a new home, with a new body and a new incorruptible life. Last but not least, the resurrection means that I can actually know the Creator of the universe as my Father and friend and meet with Him every day without fear, shame, or guilt because the resurrection has cast my sin, his judgement, and my past far far away. Now that's pretty amazing. Maybe the better question is, what hasn’t changed because of the resurrection?!?!”
“The fact that Jesus defeated death through his death and resurrection, and brought life to us means that he can change even my hard heart when I am frustrated or struggling. So he can give me the ability to live graciously with my family, and he can give them the power to forgive me when I mess up.”
Students:
“Jesus forgave us and wiped our slates clean when he died and rose again. He forgave every sin that I have done or will do, and so looking at my family members with that same view, it shows me that I can give them grace for anything they do that hurts or frustrates me. It should change how I care for them, and cause me to want to put them first, just as Jesus did for me.”
“Trusting and finding hope in the resurrection and all that it means for me today takes intentionality, that is, if I don’t take the time and energy to set my mind on it, it will have little effect on my day to day. So, thanks for reminder! The resurrection means I must be free with giving grace to those around me because the resurrection has brought infinite grace to me. The resurrection means I can let go my fear/anxiety of losing my health, my money, my home, or even my life because the resurrection brings the guarantee of a new home, with a new body and a new incorruptible life. Last but not least, the resurrection means that I can actually know the Creator of the universe as my Father and friend and meet with Him every day without fear, shame, or guilt because the resurrection has cast my sin, his judgment, and my past far far away. Now that's pretty amazing. Maybe the better question is, what hasn’t changed because of the resurrection?!?!”
As we consider living in light of Jesus and all he accomplished, we would do well to visit Paul’s letters to churches. One particular place I go to remember how I should live now, is Ephesians. Paul is so clear about who we are in chapters 1-3, and springboards into how we should live in chapters 4-6. I want to focus in on the latter part of chapter 4. How does the resurrection of Jesus impact how you live at home?
First, we should…
Consider how you see your family.
In Ephesians 4:17-32 Paul gives us this picture of the “New Life”. Here is what Paul calls us to, zooming in on verses 20-24:
“But that is not the way you learned Christ! – assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.
— Ephesians 4:20-24
Actively knowing and following Jesus at home, and considering what his resurrection means for our lives, starts with knowing who we actually are. We are to realize that we are created after the likeness of God. But it doesn’t stop there. We have to remember to see our family members as those who are created after the likeness of God as well. Choosing to see the ways they are like Him takes hard work and can be even more difficult as we are in our second month of quarantine, and yet maybe this is how you are going to be made more like Jesus.
I have done this specific exercise as I consider how I can best love Julie and Lily: I give thanks for them and God ordaining that we would be a family, and the gift that is our marriage and child. I love the child-like joy and innocence of Lily experiencing new things and learning how to do new things. I see a tender, caring, and dedicated mother in Julie who, like God, deeply cares for her child. I celebrate these things and give thanks for them often.
What can you do? Tell your family members what you love about them. No seriously, do it! It may feel uncomfortable but tell them how you see the image of God in them. It is life giving to you and them when you do. Even if it makes them as uncomfortable as you are. Ephesians 4:32 says to “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Not only should we consider how we SEE our family members, but we should also…
Consider how we talk to, and about, our families.
Do your words to your siblings, parents, or kids reflect the reality that they bear God’s image? As we read further and towards the end of Ephesians 4, we see more things Paul challenges us to do actively as part of our new lives following Jesus. He says:
“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
— Ephesians 4:29
This verse is far more than just being clean in your speech. This is encouraging us to speak in ways that build each other up. Is this something you struggle to do with members of your family? If so, you may need to ask yourself another question: Are your words flowing from a heart that knows the grace offered to you by the Lord? If so, this verse indicates that it will also show grace to those who hear.
Being able to talk lovingly and with an intent to build up can only come from a changed heart. Even those of us with a changed heart and life will continue to struggle to speak lovingly and with the intent to build up our families. We still live in the period of time before Jesus returns to make all things new, so this isn’t surprising. I think revisiting the resurrection and remembering what we would be apart from the lavish love and rescue of Jesus can help us see our family members differently and repent of the hardness our hearts continue to experience.
Jesus knows our hearts will face times of trouble. The unprecedented nature of our circumstances do not come as a surprise to him. At the end of John 13 Jesus foretells Peter’s denial. His response is stunning after revealing that he knows he will be forsaken by his disciples (and ultimately God). He says immediately after:
“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.
— John 14:1
Jesus knows that we will be troubled and responds by asking his followers to believe in him. This is an active choice we can make. Paul’s wisdom for us is that as we are more clear about who Jesus is, our lives must change. We cannot be the same. This is still true, even now!
Families, I know things are different and you are spending more time with each other than you may have expected. See the image of God in your kids, your parents, your siblings. Actively train your heart to dwell upon Jesus and his work on the cross and in his resurrection, that you would have grace-filled words and seek to build up those closest to you.
He is Risen!